Since their first Chicago convention in 1988, the International Save the Pun Foundation (I.S.T.P.F.) has annually honored a worthy member of the world of wordplay by crowning a Punster of the Year (P.O.T.Y.) Being installed on the hot seat for 2006 is another of our own Pun-Off veterans, Joel McColl. After surviving 20 years as host/emcee of this event Joel figured he had a few laurels upon which he might rest, but could not resist the invitation to be throne back into the fray. At a lively dinner banquet held on the eve of this year's competition, Joel was royally roasted and seated upon the coveted POTY chair. Surely he was flushed with pride.

Punster of the Year (P.O.T.Y.) for 2006 Joel McColl

A roast by Alan B. Combs, on the occasion of Joel McColl being selected for the POTY.

Joel McColl just retired from being the MC for the annual PunOff,
after a couple of decades of service. I have had little interaction
with Joel -- but, I know he's a musician, he sells Hondas, and he is
a genuinely smart and nice guy.

This makes it hard to roast him with any sincerity or any authority,
but, as is the case with the bull elephant in the rutting season, we
do what we must.

Early on, Joel went to work with the Gideons -- handing out comic
books. They fired him because he was on the wrong tract.

Later, Joel tried to get a job as a spokesman for the La Leche
League, but he just couldn't express himself properly.

The world is changing so fast, and it's so hard to keep up. Don Imus
has taught us that when we are tired, we really don't want to take a
knapp. And poor Santa. He has to be careful with his, "Ho, ho, ho!"

A brightly colored bug floating on a great big dollop of saliva?
Could we call him phlegm-boyant. In Flanders, they refer to that bug
as phlegmish (thanks to Jim Ryan for this one).

As many people know, I am a Mac Computer enthusiast. Apple computer
makes the iPod, the iMac, iTunes, the iPhone, and the iTV. They
have been very careful to not make any of their products ugly --
there are no iSores at Apple.

Apple has been in the forefront of teaching us what we need before we
knew we need it. I want you to know they've just done it again.

They have created a tiny, capsular MP3 player intended to be used as
a breast implant.

It costs between $200 to $700 dollars -- depending on the size.

What do they call it? They call it the iBoob, of course.

Apple Marketing feels women will love it. They are sick and tired of
men just staring at their breasts and not listening to them (this one
has been bouncing around the internet, so to speak).

I thank Joel for all the service he has given to the O. Henry Museum
and the cause of punning through all these years. We wish him the
best, and all contestants express the sincere wish that he not start
competing in the PunOff, himself, again.