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Blogs: Too Many Puns - Out On A Limerick

Add these to sum of the work bi one of the world's gratest punsters!!-- Gary Hallock

Butt of the joke

In the clinic for my colonoscopy I was invited to climb up onto a
particularly small hospital gurney. Because the procedure is done
while the patient is lying on his side, I guess they use a
narrower-than-usual model. Noting this to the doctors present, I
quipped, "So this is what they mean when they say 'polyp checks makes beds strange, fellas.'"

We've Bin Laden him alone for years so why is George Bush so
determined to kick Saddam's ass now? It's obvious he wants to divert
America's attention from the tanking economy. I think he just wants
to give Saddam a whoopin' of mass distraction.

Waging war in the midst of a recession is a sure fire way to put our
economy into the tank. Speaking of things going into the tank, how
about the price of gasoline lately? When I filled up with regular
yesterday at my local Diamond ShamIraq station I sure felt sorry for
the poor ethyls whose cars use premium. I'll bet they wish they would
OPECed a more fuel efficient car. Even if this war is over quickly,
it might still create a long termoil crisis ANWR likely to see troops
drilling in Alaska soon.

The Turks are still not shore they want us to Ankara ships on their
soil so Bush appears ready to take Kuwait and sea attitude. Christian
soldiers in our Navy have always been able to warship freely in the
open sea so I guess they may have to sortie things out for US. At any
rate Bush seems pretty Syrias about pressing this war. So by April
15th I'm sure Saddam will wish he had arranged attack shelter to
cover his assets.

Why does Bush have such great attraction
To press for this bellicose action,
Our troops to amass
To kick Saddam's ass
A whoopin' of massive distraction?

GARY HALLOCK

Latest addition

Considering the fact that many members of the National Guard and Reserves have recently been called to active duty in Iraq, don't their spouses now qualify as "weakened worriers?"

Although I'm a civilian, I was recently ticketed for running a red light in my car. I guess this "Stop laws" order doesn't only apply to the military.

GARY HALLOCK